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Desires



One of the most controversial topics in the spiritual world, is desire and its fulfillment. Many seekers have many different opinions about what is right and wrong. Some advocate either extreme, and others advocate a self defined "medium" path. 

Perhaps there is no single answer to such questions - every seeker is unique and so is the path. 

The Illusion of Fulfillment: Desires Are Never Satisfied

Desires are insatiable. No matter how much we try to satisfy them, they only grow stronger. This is evident in human nature—when one goal is achieved, another arises. Fulfilling a desire does not lead to lasting satisfaction; rather, it fuels more intense cravings. The more one indulges in pleasure, the more the mind seeks repetition of that pleasure, leading to a vicious cycle of want and temporary gratification. Lust, greed, and materialism are self-perpetuating forces that never culminate in true contentment. Instead, they push the mind further into a restless state of longing.

For example, think about our relationship with technology. A person may start with a basic smartphone and feel satisfied. But soon, a newer model is released with better features, and the desire for an upgrade takes over. Even after purchasing the latest device, the satisfaction is short-lived, as within months, another superior version arrives. This cycle repeats endlessly, illustrating how desires keep growing rather than being truly fulfilled.

The Spiritual Perspective: Fulfilling Desires to Understand Their Fallacy

Interestingly, some spiritual traditions suggest that a disciple should sometimes fulfill a persistent desire, not for indulgence but to experience firsthand that it does not bring true contentment. This method serves as an experiential lesson: when a person achieves what they desire and still finds themselves unsatisfied, they begin to understand the deceptive nature of craving. This realization is a critical step toward spiritual awakening. One learns that desires, no matter how profound, never provide permanent joy; they only give birth to new wants and more suffering.

A relatable example of this is seen in material success. Many people believe that earning a higher salary or buying a bigger house will make them happy. However, when they achieve these milestones, they often find that the happiness is short-lived. Soon, they begin to desire more wealth, more luxury, and a higher social status, demonstrating that the pursuit of external fulfillment is a never-ending race.

Suppression vs. Awareness: The Path to Transcendence

Suppressing desires is as dangerous as fulfilling them blindly. Repression does not eliminate the longing; it only buries it deep within, where it festers and grows stronger. The true path to liberation lies in observation and awareness.

Desires manifest in the mind as fleeting thoughts. They arise from external stimuli or deep-seated impressions (samskaras) stored in the subconscious. These thoughts first appear as subtle urges, which, when entertained, gain momentum and turn into strong impulses. If not examined with awareness, they hijack the mind, leading to impulsive actions and, ultimately, a sense of dissatisfaction when the expected joy does not last.

One must watch their desires from their inception to their dissolution. When a thought arises, observe its source, recognize its trigger, and notice how it gathers momentum. Observe the urge as it strengthens, but do not act on it. Instead of being carried away, simply watch it unfold. Over time, this practice reveals the transient nature of desires. When one truly understands that desires never deliver the happiness they promise, they lose their grip on the mind. Repeatedly witnessing this cycle weakens the hold of desires until they dissolve naturally.

For instance, a person struggling with unhealthy eating habits can practice this mindfulness. When they crave junk food, instead of immediately satisfying the urge or suppressing it, they can observe the thought, its source, and how it gains power. Over time, with continued awareness, the desire weakens, and healthier choices become easier.

When the mind is restless with craving, it is like a turbulent lake where one cannot see the bottom. But when one remains aware of thoughts without acting on them, the mind gradually becomes still—like a clear lake where one can see their true self. Awareness disempowers desires, making them lose their ability to disturb one’s inner peace.

The Ultimate Realization: True Happiness Lies Beyond Desire

Through deep meditation and divine grace, one can realize that ultimate happiness is not in fulfilling desires but in transcending them. True joy arises from a state of inner completeness, free from craving. When the mind no longer seeks fulfillment outside itself, it enters a state of profound peace. This state is the essence of spiritual enlightenment, where the self realizes its oneness with the infinite. This realization is not an intellectual understanding but an experiential truth—one that can only be attained through dedicated introspection and divine grace.

Gautam Buddha's View on Desires

Gautam Buddha, the enlightened one, viewed desires as the root cause of suffering. His teachings, encapsulated in the Four Noble Truths, emphasize that all suffering (dukkha) arises from attachment and craving (tanha). Buddha taught that desires create a cycle of attachment, leading to pain when they are unfulfilled or when the objects of our desires inevitably fade away. The solution, according to him, lies in the Middle Path and ultimately in Nirvana, a state of liberation from all cravings. By eradicating desire, one can achieve a state of inner peace and freedom from suffering.

Buddha used the analogy of fire to explain desires. He said that the mind, inflamed with craving, burns with suffering. When one tries to fulfill desires, they only add fuel to the fire, making it stronger. Instead, by understanding the nature of desires and practicing mindfulness, one can extinguish this fire and attain lasting peace.

Buddha also emphasized the transient nature of desires. He explained that every desire is impermanent, arising and passing away like waves in the ocean. The moment one desire is fulfilled, another takes its place, creating an endless cycle of longing. He taught that seeking fulfillment in desires is like drinking salty water to quench thirst—it only increases the craving rather than eliminating it.

He further explained that desires are rooted in ignorance (avidya). People mistakenly believe that external possessions or achievements will bring lasting happiness, but this is an illusion. The happiness derived from fulfilling a desire is temporary, and soon dissatisfaction creeps in, leading to the birth of new desires. This endless cycle, known as samsara, keeps beings trapped in suffering.

According to Buddha, the eradication of desires is the only way to attain true liberation. He taught the practice of detachment and mindfulness as a means to observe and dissolve desires. Through deep meditation (dhyana) and insight (vipassana), one can witness how desires arise and fade away, understanding their impermanence and deceptive nature. When the mind is free from craving, it naturally enters a state of blissful equanimity, leading to Nirvana—the ultimate freedom from suffering.

A whisper calls, so soft, so sweet,
A promise made, yet incomplete.
The thirst for gold, for love, for fame,
Each wish fulfilled, yet more remain.

Like waves that crash upon the shore,
Desires rise, then rise once more.
No peace is found, no rest in sight,
Just fleeting joys, then endless fight.

The mind deceived, the heart ensnared,
In wanting more, we grow impaired.
But Buddha spoke, his wisdom bright,
A path beyond this endless night.

To quench the thirst, to still the flame,
One must not play desire’s game.
Not chase, nor crush, nor turn away,
But watch it rise, then fade away.

Like clouds that drift, like leaves that fall,
Desires too, are nothing at all.
Observe their birth, observe their flight,
And watch them vanish into light.

For joy is not in wealth or fame,
Nor fleeting love, nor glory’s name.
But in the heart, so still, so free,
Beyond the chains of “I” and “Me.”

Through wisdom’s grace, through insight pure,
The soul finds peace, the mind is sure.
No cravings left, no grasping hand,
Just boundless sky and endless land.

So seek not more, but seek to see,
That what you are is always free.
No mirage chased, no longing fed,
Just silence deep, where cravings fled.

Conclusion

Desires are like mirages, leading us on an endless pursuit of happiness that remains just out of reach. They never truly satisfy; they only multiply. By watching desires mindfully, understanding their nature, and ultimately transcending them, one can attain true contentment. This process requires patience, self-awareness, and grace, but it leads to a state of inner peace that is unshakable and eternal. The key is not to suppress or indulge but to observe with deep awareness. In doing so, one steps beyond the cycle of craving and into the realm of true freedom.

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